My dreams last night were elipitical, snowy, and achey. I couldn't hear myself, but I'm sure I moaned a lot. All of the images swam before me, and every time I tossed or turned, I found myself in the middle of a new, murky stream-of-consciousness plot.

Yesterday, after my 3-minute conversation with G, I called him back, because I'd thoughtlessly forgot to let him know I was available to help him move stuff, if he needed me to. Because I had just spoken to him, when I called back I only said "Hey, it's me." by way of a greeting. And he said (And I'll never forget this) "Hey, me..." The long and short of it is that he was feeling maxed out on the move effort just then, but that he would call me if he changed his mind and required my services. Then he said he would call either way.

I didn't hear from him again last night, and I am happy to say that didn't cause me too much angst. Well, the dreams, in truth, were probably about him. I seem to recall his face floating in and out of focus.

I had a rough patch in a telephone conversation with Sara Hardesty last night. We got on the topic of marriage proposals, and she asked me how I would want to be proposed to. I said that I really wanted the scenario, whatever it was, to be in keeping with the nature of my relationship. I'm not one for production scenes. Things that are too over the top don't really ring true for me. If I suddenly found myself on a horse and carriage ride, I'd be expecting a ring, and I don't like the prefab nature of that.

I want to be proposed to in the middle of a grocery shopping trip, or one night while we're washing up the dishes after dinner, or while we're just sitting alone in the dark together, our faces only lit up by all the candles in the room.

Sara perceived this answer to be unsatisfactory, because she felt that it was indicative of a failure in me to "dream big dreams for [myself]."

I'm sorry, but I just don't think it's a failure on my part to experience overwhelming emotion, just because I don't want to get a fortune cookie with the message that says "Marry Me" inside it, or be proposed to in the middle of some schmaltzig scene on the beach with a cheesy sunset and a song by Kenny G. playing in the background.

So I think it really annoyed her when I said I'd want my boyfriend cum fiance to call me on his cigarette break when I was having a terrible day at work to ask me if I'd be his wife.

Also, there is something ungenerous about dreaming up your own proposal. That's about the man who's asking you. That's about his creativity and the plans in his heart to fuse his knowledge of you with his own resources, and come up with a moment you'll never forget. I think it's gauche to have anything in mind at all. It's just another way of being a control freak.