Mint Tea & Honey (before Bed)

I've been on a cooking jag lately (drat! I should have taken and posted pictures!). Last night, I made guacamole and broiled steak (the instant mashed potatoes and broccoli don't count); today, redskinned potato salad and sauteed shrimp. Oh, and for breakfast this morning, I made chocolate chip muffins--albeit from a box. The point is, I've got time to do these things. Cooking for my sister and taking naps is oddly fulfilling.

after memoir workshop today, I had the occasion to talk to a classmate who's been laid off since november. she said she only wished that she'd not spent the time at the beginning being stressed out, that she'd just enjoyed it. Now, after months, she's understandably feeling the need to get herself a situation.

I have one lone iron in the fire, and I don't know if it will spark, or if it will be enough of a spark. I don't know what's best. I do know that I have actually been enjoying the time. I do know that it was best for me to be let go from my old position before I became a complete liability. Things come to the organic--to the right--conclusion. Sometimes we have the luxury of being able to see that in the moment.

This is not acceptable to say, I know, but I have yet to see any jobs that I actually want. Is that terrible? Am I prideful because even though I have just about a month's worth of my old salary to my name, I'm not willing to be an Administrative Assistant, let alone wash dishes or sweep floors somewhere?

Practically speaking, how much less my old salary should I take? At one point do I have to take what I can get, no matter what?

Most days I have the sense that things will be fine. I just don't know what fine will mean in a week. In a month. In a year. I've already given up hope of owning a home by this time in 2010, but maybe in the most crucial ways I haven't made all the necessary adjustments.

Unemployment is still a mystery.

The only thing to do right now is watch The Gilmore Girls Season 7 on DVD and drink peppermint tea w/honey. It goes down just a little easier that way.