Couples!

The Autumnal Fete made made me realize, again, just how wonderful my friends are. The guests were comprised of singles and couples--the best cross section of all my relationships. Sarah managed to get some pics of a few of these couples and after downloading them to my computer, I found my self studying each one for long periods of time. I could see in each photograph the essence of the relationships. The delightfully playful and sweet Monito and his Devika, M & R's committment to each other--the realness of them as a twosome, B and S's electric chemistry, The comfortability and complete oneness of D & J. The thing is, all of these people, together, have all of these things (though the pics reveal one element of who they are as twosomes). Something about it made me feel hopeful, but wonderfully, happily sad.

I know it's weird, but I kept the photos up and open while I worked today. It made me feel better, closer to them, closer to something.

I'm all fiercely independent (and not at all sure that i'm cut out for a relationship), but if I could find a man who excited my skin, who wouldn't try to keep me on a leash, who'd let me love him fiercely while protecting his solitude, his freedom, and his independence, well i'd be there.

why can't i get over some things? that's what i need to know. i keep dreaming about mr. close encounters. he made such a mistake.