Results from a comprehensive dating profile survey

Who You Are

You're adored, and for good reasons

You're a pillar of strength and stability for the people in your life. You're responsible, loyal, and hardworking. In a crisis, you're definitely the one your friends and co-workers come running to. In fact, you're known for your common sense advice and business savvy. Your life is very ordered and busy since you're always juggling your career, family and friends, and community involvement. But you have room in your life for someone special. You're not someone who "wears her heart on his sleeve" so those close to you don't always know how you feel. However, they always know they can count on you to do what you say and say what you mean.


What's dating all about to you?

Falling in love is a spiritual experience for you. A truly loving relationship helps bring meaning to your life. You try hard to make your date feel comfortable and have a good time. You're good at anticipating what other people need and giving it to them. But inside, you're usually on an emotional roller coaster. You don't want to reject nice men, but also take it very personally if you're the one rejected. You're constantly trying to find the "rules" for successful dating but often find they don't work.

Although having a vision of what you want can be helpful, the risk is that your high standards and rush to find the perfect man can get in the way of loving a real-life imperfect man. It won't come naturally to you, but you're more likely to find what you want if you can sit back, "go with the flow," and see where dating leads you.

Who You're Looking For

He'll be an enigma

You're looking for a man who's smart, insightful, and has an insatiable curiosity about life. The two of you could share a very interesting and exciting intellectual connection. Getting close emotionally takes time, since he's an independent and sometimes shy man by nature. But he's worth the effort to get to know! Your best strategy is to see him "in action" when you go out with friends but still find quiet time with him to talk. You'll discover he's a good conversationalist, especially if you get him talking about books, current events, or any of his many interests and hobbies.

You don't expect your partner to be in a good mood all the time. You understand that sometimes your partner will be down, get pessimistic or worry too much. These days are balanced by the many good days the two of you will share. In fact, you share a number of positive qualities, including:

No strong similarities were detected, which suggests that you may be more attracted to certain "opposite qualities." Please read the next sections to see if you may be seeking someone with different or opposite qualities to balance your own habits and style.

Finding someone like you

You want to share your life with someone who has the same values, goals, and style you have. Research has shown that couples who have more in common tend to stay together longer. The qualities you find attractive (and unattractive) in men suggest you would certainly be happier with a man who's more like you.

No very strong opposites were detected, which suggests that you are most attracted to men who are very similar to you. This is good news since similar couples tend to stay together longer.

Quirks you can tolerate

The truth is that everyone is potentially "high maintenance." We all have our quirks and shortcomings. The key to long-term harmony is finding a man who can tolerate (or maybe even enjoy) your "quirks," or the little personal oddities that make you unique. You seem okay with several common quirks that might come along with your "ideal" man:

You described a pretty balanced person as most attractive to you, so no strong quirks were noted. Watch out for quirks during dating, since they may indicate a strong quality that is hidden at first.

Downside of your "ideal"

In addition to his quirks, your "ideal" personality type may have other qualities that are more frustrating or challenging to deal with. Under stress, his quirks can become serious "flaws." But remember, these quirks are the "flip side of the coin," or the extreme end of qualities you otherwise find appealing. So, be prepared if:

Because you're most attracted to men with balanced personalities, no troubling differences were noted. Nevertheless, remember that too much similarity can lead to conflict as well, especially when problems call for very different perspectives or actions.

Deal breakers

You seem ready to adapt to the good and frustrating qualities of the men you're looking for, but there are types of men you clearly do NOT like. Men's habits and attitudes you'd have a hard time putting up with include:

Idealistic or artistic men who get lost in their own world as they pursue their dreams. (Irony!)

Trade-offs you'll face

Good Qualities vs. Challenging Qualities

Tries to balance spending time with a few close friends and going out with a big group of friends.

Given the demands of family, friends, and activities, it's hard to find time alone together.

Comes up with lots of great ideas about how to do things better or improve the world.

Creative ideas are often impractical or unrealistic.

Can step back and look objectively at a problem, which can be helpful to you in any crisis.

Almost impossible to turn off analysis and thinking about what's happening.

Tries to be decisive, but still not rush into anything.

How much attention is given to problems and how decisions get made seems unpredictable.